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A FEAR OF COMMITMENT Author: Charli Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with Pirates of the Caribbean; it all belongs to other people and not me. This is a figment of my imagination! Summary: Always imagined Jack as a single bachelor with a willing woman in every port? What happens when the woman he loves tells him some surprising news that will change his life forever? Author's Note: This is a continuation of the doll series, please read and review. * * * * * “Ow!” You curse as the sharp point of the needle buries itself into your thumb, causing you to drop the sewing that had been on your lap. It scatters over the floor in every direction creating quite the colourful scene as the cotton reels spin easily across the decks, losing their threads. You grumble is muffled as the injured thumb settles in your mouth and you drop awkwardly to your knees to retrieve everything. One of the reels rolls idly on the wooden floors, making a dull, hollow echo before it’s stopped by a brown boot. Jack sets down his weem on the desk, the silver tool he uses for navigation, before bending to pick up the object. Smirking, his eyes flicker between you and the cotton reel as he waits until you have finished. “You know, if you paid more attention to the sewing, you’d stop pricking yourself,” he comments, watching you freeze. You look back at him over your shoulder and shrug slightly, “I guess I’m just clumsy.” One dark eyebrow disappears under his bandana. “That must be a new found trait.” Sitting in the chair, you stay silent and rearrange your things even though his gaze is burning you. Leaning back in his chair, Jack props his boots up on the desk; the new destination long forgotten. It could wait until he had found out what was wrong. “I may have been mistaken, but I thought that you were enjoying living on board.” “I am,” you reply, thumbing through the pile of sewing. “Interesting,” he replies, never taking his gaze off you. “One may think that you’d liven up if you were truly enjoying yourself. Or perhaps there is something worrying you that you are not telling me.” You wince, but it’s undetectable due to your bowed head. It was true; you have been noticeably quieter recently, but then you do have an excuse. It's not everyday that you have to endure this problem, but you're determined to not let it ruin your routine or relationship with Jack. “I’m fine,” you tell him, placing the sewing back on the chair and walking into the side cabin to rifle through more clothes in need of mending. Feet echo on the boards as the pirate follows you. “You never could lie,” Jack drawls, standing with his feet crossed and one arm resting on the door frame. Sighing inwardly, you take the next ripped shirt and turn to face Jack. “Perhaps living on a pirate ship has changed me.” “Indeed it has,” he agrees, and you flash him a small smile before pushing past. “But that is not what you are worrying about. Don’t lie to me,” Jack’s voice whispers in your ear as he grips your wrist. You look back at him though he is half obscured in the shadows, “I’m not worrying, I’m merely… thinking deeply.” A small smirk crosses Jack’s face as he realises how much time you must have been spending around him. How else would your attitude have changed so much? “Thinking deeply about what exactly?” “Lots of things,” you reply innocently. “Don’t delve into a woman’s mind, Jack; it’s a very scary place.” A full grin spreads across his lips as he steps closer to you once more, “But I’ve always been interested in delving into forbidden places.” The comment instinctively makes you roll your eyes, and you pull away from him, only for him to tug you back. His hands find their natural place on your hips as your faces stay mere inches apart. Slowly Jack closes the gap between you and presses his lips to your own. You feel his tongue flick at your lips and surrender to the pleasure it brings to your body. These were the sorts of kisses that you hated, the ones that weakened your resolve and made you open for his manipulation. Gently he lets you go, one arm sliding around your waist as he knows you feel slightly dizzy. That only helps add to his arrogance. Pulling away enough to focus properly on him once again, a pleased smile creeps over your lips at his smirk. “I’m forbidding you from doing that again, Captain,” you murmur and he groans slightly. “Come with me,” he mutters, taking your hand and pulling you from the cabin. Jack’s gaze searches the decks quickly, and for once he’s pleased about not seeing many of the crew. Quietly, you both slip across the moonlit decks and Jack climbs the steps to the helm with you right behind him. On reaching the helm, Jack turns and presses you against it firmly, and you smile innocently, “I didn’t think anyone came between a Captain and his ship, evidently I was wrong.” Shrugging, Jack smiles and runs his hands lightly down your arms, making you shiver. He catches your hands and twirls you around so that you can look out to sea, before pressing your entwined hands onto one of the wooden spokes to keep you still. The lights of the latest town sparkle and twinkle from your anchored position and hold a calming, hypnotic quality. The pirate waits a few minutes until he feels you relax completely, leaning your head back on his chest. “Is it the crew that are worrying you?” He asks with his mouth close to your ear. You respond, “Jack, let’s not do this now.” “Humour me,” he replies, tickling the side of your neck with his lips and interjects as he hears your protest. “A simple yes or no game is all. I’ll ask you the questions and you answer yes or no, considering that is all I am likely to get from you.” You nod, that wouldn’t be so bad and it is unlikely Jack would pick the right subject. Though if he did, you feared the response. That was the reason you would not tell him until you were completely certain. “Are the crew causing problems?” He asks, nipping your skin and making you gasp. “No, they’re lovely,” you reply, wondering how long he would persist with this game. “Aye, I agree, though don’t tell them I said that,” he says with a grin before going onto the next question. “Do you not like living on the ship?” Shaking your head, you say, “No, I love being with you.” Jack sighs, skating a hand round to your stomach and you tense slightly. “Have I done something wrong?” “Definitely not,” you reply, twisting fingers with him. “Are you ill? Do you not like living me? Is there something wrong with your jobs?” He asks, fast running out of possibilities. “No to all three.” You feel the Jack’s bandana pressing into your shoulder. “Why don’t you trust me, luv?” A sudden wave of guilt washes over you and it causes you to turn in his grip. “I have to be sure before I tell you,” you explain. Jack nods silently. She couldn’t be, could she? “Can we go back in now? I’ve been really tired recently, and you need some rest,” you say, smiling gently and concealing a yawn. “Of course, luv,” Jack murmurs though his mind is completely preoccupied with fleeting wonderings. On entry of the cabin you stretch your arms above your head and walk towards the comfortingly inviting bed. Flopping down exhausted, Jack catches your attention as he shuffles about in a cupboard. “What are you doing?” You ask. “Finding this,” Jack replies, waving a bottle of brown liquid in the air, and you wince. Damn. Swaying back over to you, he joins you on the bed, holding one bottle as though it is his sacred prize. “To enjoy together,” he tells you, his face as blank as a mask. “Unless you can think of some sort of celebration we can toast too?” You look eyes with him and see the unreadable look. “Jack, I can’t drink the alcohol.” A fear seems to clutch the pirate as he stares at you. “And why would that be?” Growing doubt gnaws at you as silence hangs in the air. If you told him, he couldn’t do anything that bad, could he? Chewing your lip in indecision you glance at him, surprised by the sudden lack of emotion. “I think I’m with child.” Two waves of emotion pass swiftly over Jack; the first is shock and second is humour. He starts chuckling and you stare at him in disbelief. “What’s so funny?” “You’re joking, aren’t you? Please tell me you are joking.” “I’m not, Jack,” you tell him seriously, tears brimming in your eyes. He seemed to sober up in seconds before uncorking the bottle in his hand and taking a long drink from it. “I’ll have to leave you here,” he says blankly, not meeting your eyes. Your head snaps up at the words. “What? How can you leave me and your child somewhere completely foreign?” “I can’t have you on the ship. That would be completely irresponsible.” Jack stands, pacing the length of the cabin. “As irresponsible as just running away from this?” You question sharply though you are completely devastated by his response. Without saying another word, Jack shrugs absently, twirls on his heel, and goes to the door. “Where are you going?” You ask, following him like a little lost puppy. “Town,” he replies shortly, his head in too much of a muddle to think. “I knew woman were bad luck.” You blink, staring at his back, “Jack, how have I been bad luck?” He stops and turns in the doorway to face you. Jack’s face is the mask you used to wear, completely unreadable, but you can see fear written in his eyes. “You’re pregnant.” Tears instantly fill your eyes, and you pick up the closest heavy item before hurling it at him. Jack’s eyes widen, and he shuts the door quickly so that it merely bounces off, before striding to the edge of the ship. Miserably you crumple to a heap on the bed, pulling the pillow towards you to muffle the sobs. * * * * He hadn’t been sitting there long, but it was long enough. Sitting forward in his chair, Jack sighs. He’d been a fool. Again. And yet you still stayed with him. What sort of man was he to deserve someone like you when, let’s face it, he had treated you like dirt? As soon as he had set foot on dry land, Jack knew he had made a mistake but it was his stubborn pride that kept him from turning around and going straight back. Who knew what sort of mood you could be in now and he didn’t like the possibilities of having his face rearranged or the worst scenario, being castrated. Ouch. The bar Jack is currently residing in is not as bad as others he has previously graced with his presence but it still leaves a bitter aftertaste. The tankard of rum he had bought on arrival sits untouched on the table before him as the thoughts swirl around Jack’s preoccupied mind. He is going to be a father. On paper those words would appear black and white, a happy turn of events but for Jack, there are many grey areas. If he was having a child, that would be a huge change to his life. No, not if but when, considering the idea had already been put into motion. Having a child would mean he could not be the same pirate he once was, but then was that as bad as he thought? He’d still have his ship and the crew and he’d already given up all women of the night when you gave him a second chance. Jack winces; he’d probably just thrown away that second chance. Surveying the bar, his thought muddled brain takes in a fight happening in one corner as one man smashes a chair over his opponent, effectively knocking him unconscious. If that ever happened to him, which of course it wouldn’t, a child would be able to continue his name. That is a reassuring thought for he certainly wouldn’t want people forgetting about Captain Jack Sparrow. And better yet, if the child turned out to be a son, he could train him to take over the Pearl when Jack was too old to captain her. Jack could teach him about the sea, navigating, the art of smooth talking and groom his son into understanding the concept of freedom. That was if he didn’t naturally inherit it from him. Jack’s fingers tap absently on the seat as he muses silently to himself. What if the child was a daughter? How could he be a good father to a girl when he couldn’t even treat his own wife with respect? Although a girl could be useful to him and he’d have to find a way to cope. She’d be a beauty for sure, judging by the looks of her mother. But there was no way she would work in a tavern, no, the daughter of Captain Jack Sparrow would never degrade herself that low. But was he ready? Jack stretches before tuning in to the events happening around him. Finally he realised why the bar was not so enjoyable sitting here tonight, he’d also changed. Yes, he was still the lovely rogue but he now had other pleasures in life that he valued more than this. And that was something Jack never thought he would understand but it would appear he finally did. With his mind made up Jack stands and pushes through the drunks, out of the tavern and back to the ship. * * * * You hear footsteps outside the cabin and then the turnings of the door handle before the door creaks open. You lie still, waiting for Jack to decide what he was going to do. In the darkness, Jack reaches out to feel the wall and follows it towards the bed but trips over an obstacle on the way. He falls to the floor with a resounding thud, followed by a loud ‘oof’ and you smile smugly. Serves you right. Jack picks up the object and brings it close to his eyes in an attempt to work out what it is. From the shape and feel of it he recognises it as one of his spyglass. What the blazes was that doing there? Tossing it aside, he starts crawling again in the direction of the bed but finds his path blocked again. “Luv?” He asks in bewilderment. You debate whether or not to answer. “What?” You reply after a moments pause in a stony tone. “Why is everything not how I left it?” He asks, feeling around the blockage and a sense of security rushes over him as he feels the bedpost. You smirk, “I decided some of your things weren’t in the right places.” “You did this?” He asks horrified, whilst pulling himself onto the bed to loom over you. Nodding, you roll away, “Aye I did, and I’m not sorry.” A silence falls and you lie still, not being able to see Jack’s proud smile at your bravery. “You know I looked at the houses on the island,” he begins. “Did you especially look for the smallest, most uncomfortable one?” You ask bitterly. Jack continues ignoring your sarcasm, “And I decided they are not good enough for you to raise my baby in so you will have to stay on the ship with me.” You scoff, “Are you sure, oh mighty pirate captain, I would so hate to inconvenience you.” “Listen to me,” Jack says, crawling over to you. “I know I don’t say this a lot but I love you and I could never let you go.” You roll over to face his direction in the darkness, “Even though I’m bad luck.” Jack smiles wryly, pulling you close to him, “Darling the phrase ‘It takes two to tango’ says it all.” You nod, not resisting the closeness, “Can you cope with a baby, Jack?” Jack smiles to himself at giving the answer he had never thought he would give. “I shouldn’t have said what I said but I was… scared.” You nod mutely, letting him go on. “It’s true. Love takes off masks that we fear we can not live without but know we can not live within,” he says quietly. “You’re having my baby, luv, and that’s all that matters to me.” THE END |